As you walk in, the selection is quite overwhelming. Who knew there were so many types of Juice? No – not Juice – juice. Fruit juice. Jo interrupts your staring at the menu.

“If you don't know what to try, I quite like the banana and strawberry smoothie. I know you're quite new to…” they wave their hand around vaguely “this.”

You buy four of the smoothies, stopping yourself before saying some mysterious phrase in payment and using your card instead. The barista is staring at your whiskers, but politely doesn't comment.

You sit down at a table with Jo and That Shady Guy, and surreptitiously let the squirrels out of your rucksack. You've learnt already that certain establishments don't approve of squirrels being brought in, but you didn't want to make then feel left out. They sit on the table around one of the smoothies, sucking it through straws. They really aren't subtle, especially with their huge amounts of fur, but at least nobody is kicking up a fuss.

Jo tries to make conversation. “So… this is something to do with the Juice you have back home? Is it much like the juice we have here?”

“Not really. It's not the sort of thing you'd actually want to drink. You've seen all the lightning our Juice turns into in the Mundane—sorry about that by the way—and it's not quite that bad back in Dream, but it still sparks.”

“What do you think of Mundane juice then?”

You take a sip. “It's lovely.”

“And now for the award of Doctorate of Vetinary Medicine: Reinaldo Au, Kassandra Hobdy, Lavelle Gunther, Fidela Kappel, Bertie Lofgren.”

*applause*

“Geralyn Pizarro, Kesha Potvin, Oretha Sokoloff, Tek Tempest—”

“Woo! Go Dr. Tempest!”

The speaker pauses to recover their composure while glaring into the audience. “—Rex Tweed, Dallas Winchester.”

*applause*

I know the Juiceologists are still raving about Tek Tempest's notes on what the science Jos have worked out about Mundane physics, but I still maintain that it makes no sense. Lanthamum was a perfectly respectable variant on a transition metal, but all the other lanthanides are derivative, uninspired and superfluous. Furthermore, what were they thinking with the observable universe!? Whole areas of reality provably irrelevant to the plot? I know the Mundane course may sound new and exciting, but I cannot recommend that you pursue it.

—Private correspondence from Professor Hypnos to a prospective student